That Jesus taught and subscribed to the gospel of forgiveness is not debatable. He set forth the principle in the model prayer in Matthew 6:9–13. Verse 12 reads, "And forgive us our debts, as we forgive our debtors." He re-emphasizes the thought in verses 14 and 15 after the closing of the prayer, stating, "For if ye forgive men their trespasses, your heavenly Father will also forgive you: but if ye forgive not men their trespasses, neither will your Father forgive your trespasses." Jesus must have thought it of utmost importance. It is the only portion of the prayer that He re-emphasizes.

Why is it so difficult for us—the followers of Christ—to live by this gospel? (Yes, we call it a gospel because to receive forgiveness is indeed good news.) I think it must be a matter of personal pride. We may have been wronged, and we want the wrongdoer to suffer and "twist in the wind" a bit. Sometimes we even feel that to be in a spirit of forgiveness is to show weakness.

There is a quote that my wife Jackie and I have used in our Marriage Maintenance Seminars over the years. Let me repeat it here: "Forgiveness is bearing the suffering of another's wrong and letting the wrongdoer go free from our retaliation or grudge-holding. Offered unconditionally, just as we have experienced it from God, forgiveness restores the peace of the wounded one and paves the way for a response from the offender.

"Although some consequences may be so irreversible as to prohibit full restoration, when the offered forgiveness is accepted in a spirit of repentance and change, the relationship stands at the threshold of a new beginning.

"Un-forgiveness is a toxin. It poisons the heart and mind with bitterness, distorting one's whole perspective on life. Anger, resentment and sorrow begin to overshadow and overwhelm the unforgiving person—a kind of soul-pollution—that inflames evil appetites and evil emotions. Forgiveness is the only antidote."

Have you ever heard someone say, "I will forgive, but I won't forget"? I suspect that such forgiveness isn't really forgiveness at all. God, Himself, forgets our offenses after He has granted forgiveness: "For I will forgive their iniquity, and I will remember their sin no more" (Jeremiah 31:34).

The classic text on forgiveness is so full of hope and encouragement for the faulty one: "If we confess our sins, He is faithful and just to forgive us our sins, and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness" (I John 1:9). In those few but powerful words I hear forgiveness, healing, restoration and reform.

My sincere belief is that no person or situation is worth my soul salvation. If I cannot forgive, I cannot be forgiven. Whatever it is, my friend, it can't possibly be worth missing Heaven.