"You look beautiful today!” I paused uncomfortably to acknowledge the compliment from a very married man one Sabbath morning, before escaping to my own Sabbath school.

Maybe you’re like me, one of those socially deviant, single young adults who watch your friends succumb one by one to marriage, until singles your age seem like an endangered species. But what troubles me more than the lack of options at my age are married flirts. I admit the comments are usually fairly rare, but sometimes they present quite an attractive offer and this creates a huge challenge for young adults.

One attractive offer I received was from a married Navy officer who wanted me to have his phone number, which I emphatically refused. But these experiences are just an example of a growing problem where married people flirt with single young adults. This isn’t a new problem, however, since Joseph had to refuse Mrs. Potiphar’s advances as well.

Probably each of us knows situations where that line has been crossed and lives have been forever effected. So how can single young adults protect themselves from attractive advances from married individuals?

In some ways, we may be especially vulnerable since singles can feel lonely and desire companionship. The first way to protect yourself is to call these actions by their right name. Joseph said, “How then could I do such a wicked thing and sin against God?” (Gen. 39:9) It is sin. And it’s not just sin against yourself, or the other person, but against God. Our first commitment must be to God and our relationship with Him.

Second, decide right now you will keep yourself pure from everyone and save yourself for marriage … if that is in your future. Think about what lines you will not cross and what to do if someone else tries to cross them. Important decisions are not made in a moment, but in advance. The decision to endure the cross was made in Gethsemane, not as Jesus was walking to the cross.

The third thing is to watch for signs that a married individual, or yourself, might be close to crossing that invisible line of inappropriate emotions. Protect yourself from becoming attached to your girlfriend’s husband, or that married church member. Physically separate yourself from them until your emotions have cooled down. Joseph not only refused to go to bed with Mrs. Potiphar, but also to “even be with her” (Genesis 39:10).

Lastly, take Paul’s advice to “pray continually” (1 Thess. 5:17). Our only strength is remaining connected to God through challenges. There is no happiness in the other option, no matter what Hollywood says. Decide now you will be sexually pure, no matter who, what, where, and when!

Kara Kerbs is an outpatient counselor in Muncie, Indiana.