A love of music brought Mariellyn Hill and Ralph DeSchaff together. They were married on Nov. 23, 2025, at the Downers Grove Church before a group of family, friends and staff from the Concord Place Retirement Community in Northlake, Illinois. [Photo credit: Andrzej Mucka]
Two residents of Concord Place Retirement Community in Northlake, Illinois, recently had that Greek proverb printed on their wedding invitation. Mariellyn Hill, 88, and Ralph DeSchaff, 79, pledged to live out those words when they were married on Nov. 23, 2025. Pastor Ira Bartolome officiated the ceremony at Downers Grove Seventh-day Adventist Church.
Mariellyn and Ralph wholeheartedly agree that their relationship at this stage in their lives was guided by divine providence. Ralph had lived at Concord Place for eight years when Mariellyn arrived. As a Welcome Ambassador, he often greets new residents and looks for shared interests that help people connect. Music quickly became one of those bridges.
“When I found out that Mariellyn liked to sing, I asked if we could have lunch together,” Ralph said. “Right away I was impressed by her outgoing nature and happy spirit.”
Mariellyn, for her part, had already noticed Ralph through another avenue of community life. She had heard him preach during services at Concord Place and was struck by his sincerity. “I immediately saw his love for God,” she said. “That was one of the things that drew me to him.”
As their conversations continued, the couple discovered they shared similar upbringings. Both had been raised in homes where the Bible and regular church attendance played a central role. Ralph’s life had taken him through active military service and a 35-year career with United Airlines. Along the way, he attended a Bible institute in Saskatchewan, Canada, where he earned ministerial credentials.
As their relationship deepened, Mariellyn introduced Ralph to her faith tradition, Seventh-day Adventism, and invited him to attend church with her. The welcome he received left a lasting impression.
“I’ve been in many churches in my day,” Ralph said, “but I’ve never met kinder and more welcoming individuals than I found at Downers Grove. I feel right at home there.”
Beyond worship services, Ralph especially appreciated the Sabbath School experience. “We dig deeply into Scripture together,” he said. When Pastor Bartolome offered to study the Bible with him personally, Ralph readily accepted. He completed all 26 lessons.
Through those studies and ongoing conversations, Ralph began to recognize strong parallels between Adventism and his previous denomination. He also came to appreciate the distinctives.
“Two of the main differences were the day of worship and not eating pork,” he explained. “I came to see Saturday as a day of rest and renewal. The Sabbath became a time to focus on worship, fellowship, and time with our Creator. Instead of typical weekday activities, I now spend that time reading and reflecting.”
When Ralph completed his studies, he felt ready to formally join the church that had welcomed him so warmly. He admitted feeling nervous about the process.
“At first I thought I would have to take a test,” Ralph admitted. “But the pastor explained that a test wasn’t required. I was accepted on profession of faith, there was a vote, and I was in.”
When the couple decided to marry, they knew they wanted a church wedding. They chose the congregation where Mariellyn had long felt at home and where Ralph had found such encouragement. Pastor Bartolome was happy to officiate.
One of the most meaningful aspects of the day was the presence of their adult children. “Our family has been very accepting and supportive,” the couple acknowledges. “It means a great deal to see them genuinely happy for us.”
Music, a shared passion, was woven throughout the celebration. Mariellyn’s son, Benjamin Hill, sang a hymn at the service, offering a medley centered on “The Lord’s Prayer.” Ralph’s son, Brian DeSchaff, served as best man and later sang several songs at the reception, including the love song “Unchained Melody.”
The bride and groom also added their own musical testimony. Near the end of the service, they sang a verse of “Blessed Assurance” as a duet. The congregation joined them in the chorus, led by their sons.
“We chose that hymn because it is our story,” Mariellyn said. “It’s our testimony. We know that Jesus is ours, and that certainty is a foretaste of glory divine. We want to live our days together filled with His goodness, lost in His love.”
As newlyweds, Mariellyn and Ralph continue to share their faith and love of music through an outreach ministry that brings comfort to others. They are part of a singing group of 15 to 20 volunteers who visit nursing homes and other facilities. “We don’t just sing and leave,” Mariellyn explained. Drawing from her years as a nursing home administrator, she understands how easily loneliness can take hold. Group members bring small gifts and prayer cards, but more importantly, they take time to connect. “We sit with people. We talk, and we listen. So often, someone’s face lights up when they realize they are being seen and heard.” Prayer is central to those visits. “As we share the love of Jesus, we are blessed too,” she said. “Having a ministry together is a wonderful thing, and this is ours.”
Ralph brings an additional layer of connection through his military background. “When we visit, I try to spot the veterans,” he said. “As a Navy veteran and former Chaplain’s Yeoman, I understand some of what they’ve experienced. Often, they’ll share things they might not tell others. It’s a privilege to pray together and to share songs and Scripture.”
Looking back, the couple sees God’s hand not only in their meeting, but in the purpose that continues to unfold. “We are living proof that God can bring two people together at any age and life stage,” Mariellyn said. “We are grateful that He brought us together and continues to give us ways to serve Him and those around us.”
Beverly Matiko, a retired associate professor of English and communication, lives in Niles, Michigan.
